Starry Wisdom

This is completely for myself. I didn’t mean to be all emo again, but I think I need to, for my own records.

Yesterday, we spent all day with sneakers. We took a nap in the bed, and sat wth her outside, and on the couch. While outside Sneakers saw a humming bird, and hid in some flower bushes. She couldn’t move much, but I know she was enjoying it in the best way possible. I gave her a couple of raspberries, which she licked at, but couldn’t really muster the strength or desire to eat. The same with treats, and her soft food.

When the time came, she got right in to her carrier, which was odd, she usually despised it. She was silent on the car ride, unlike normally when she would mew and meow the entire way to the vet. She would also not take any Pounce treats, even her favorite catnip variety.

At the vet, they quickly brought us in to the back room, and we took the top off the carrier and let Sneakers sit quietly on her towel. Soon the vet came in, and remarked that Sneaker’s fur was still amazingly shiny, soft and silky, despite being so ill (we knew this already, Sneakers always had awesome fur). The vet then told us what was going to happen, and then we began the procedure. Sneakers lay still as Erin and I pet her, and within a minute of starting, she had passed on, quietly, and peacefully.

We cried over her corpse for a bit, and said our final goodbyes. I, of course, had already had a separation from her, so this has been much harder on Erin.

After we left, we made a stop at Bevmo, for some booze, cheese and crackers. When we got back, erin cried in bed as I threw out the litter boxes, and cleaned up the food dishes. It was very weird to see Erin’s house without those things in it, and to know that there was no cat hiding somewhere.

Again, goodbye Sneakers, you were the best cat ever.

Sneakers, my ex’s cat, who was also my cat for a long time (and I still consider my cat, even though I don’t live with her) is sick. Very sick. She’s had kidney disease for the past several years, and it has progressed to End stage in the past couple of months. In the past two weeks she has degraded greatly. She also has arthritis in her spine, and she has a hard time walking. Pretty much all she’s been doing is eating and sleeping, but she was getting some joy from going outside and sitting in the sun.

Erin talked to the vet yesterday, and they decided that Sneaker’s quality of life was just not there anymore. Emotionally, I want to think this is not true, that there are still things she enjoys, but logically, I know that it’s not really true. Besides, she has a hard time walking without being drugged up on kitty narcotics. At this point, prolonging the inevitable would be more for us than for Sneakers. So we’ve decided to bring her in to be put to sleep this afternoon.

I stayed over at Erin’s last night, so I could spend as much time as possible with her. I bought her some raspberries, one of her favorite foods, and she enjoyed some of those last night. But I can also tell that there is a definite lack of spark there. She’s still Sneakers, but she’s missing the vibrancy that was always a key part of her cat personality.

Even though I haven’t lived with her for the past two years, I felt happy knowing she was around, and that I could see her on occasion. I am going to miss her a lot.